Dear Love,

Today I’m here to tell you that I love you, deeply and truly! You need to know this, because I’ve noticed that you are doing it again. You are doubting, feeling down and worse, you let the fear reign again.

Sweety, you are OK! It’s OK to still go through this. You’ve been trying, I know. You’ve been meditating, visualizing and you’ve purged so much. But, Darling, it takes time. Be patient, I swear it will work out. It always does, remember!?

I know you want to cite past experiences, situations and people, but they don’t matter. You are in the now, now! When you visualize, you’re creating memories from your future. I know that you still struggle with the self-love bit. I know you still sometimes cry when you are asked to visualize that; that’s ok. Because I’ve also noticed how often you laugh now; and how much joy and bliss you’ve experienced as of late.

See, you ARE holding the good thoughts much longer now. You haven’t given up. No, not you, my sweet little fighter. You defiantly wipe away those tears and try again. And that’s why it’ll work out. Your life is amazing, you are loved by so many, go and love yourself like they do. You can. Your light has been shining like a giant beacon. Look around at all these new faces in your life. They all have one thing in common – they smile at you. See, now you are drawing those who not only see you for who you are, but love you because of it. Let’s not disappoint them, by making their love and light meaningless, when we proclaim, if even in the smallest voice, doubts about that offering.

You are the light. You are magnificent and amazing in every way, because of who you are. So, listen well, sweet warrior goddess, I love you. Always and forever.

Love and Light,

Your Higher Self


Supervillains vs. Superheroes

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And today we witness another battle between good and bad in the never ending saga and continuing fight for Carmen’s soul and happiness.

In the ring, as of this morning, we have Captain Low-Self-Esteem, teamed up with Doctor Fear and Mr. Doubt in the right corner. In the left corner we have Little Ms. Sunshine, Supergirl and Lady Optimistic.

Round 1: Captain LSE throws a left hook to Little Ms. Sunshine, temporarily dazing her. But wait, Supergirl steps into the arena and deals a right cross to Doctor Fear, who goes down like a sack of hot potatoes. Meanwhile, Lady Optimistic snuck up from the back and knocks out Mr. Doubt with a combo of left cross, right hook and a roundhouse to the head.

Lights out for Mr. Doubt. Mr. LSE, now outnumbered, turns around and runs as fast as he can. And for today, the winners are Little Ms. Sunshine, Supergirl and Lady Optimistic. The fight for C.H.’s soul and happiness was won for today and she shall live another day, feeling worthy, happy, strong, unafraid and optimistic.

One day at a time. And tomorrow, when/if these sons of bitches show up again, I’ll knock their ass down again; until they finally realize, there is no fight to be won here. No trophy to be attained and no arena or audience for their dirty fights, filthy mouths and crazy voices. Happiness, it’s a fight and I’m doing it right.


Skeptic or Schmuck?

It is easy to spot the religious nuts, the fanatics and other seemingly crazy individuals who openly engage in hate, fear mongering, discrimination and other douche baggery. After all, the craziest people tend to be the loudest, making sure their message of (<–insert BS here) is spread to the masses. Of course, it is generally also easy to ridicule them for their blatant fanaticism. But what about the “skeptics?”

A skeptic is supposed to be someone with an open mind. After all, the purpose of being a skeptic is to doubt the validity of something posing as factual; and that generally requires studying and listen to all evidence, not just to what we want to be true, want to subscribe to or want to believe. A skeptic should never cramp their “facts” down another one’s throat, or worse, ridicule and belittle those who believe, think or view things differently. When one behaves like that, one is no longer a skeptic but a schmuck, sporting the same stubborn attitude and unwillingness to budge or learn, as a fanatic does.

I always try to conceive the unexplainable. It doesn’t mean I blindly buy into anything. But there is plenty of evidence on both side of a fence and after studying a certain thing long enough, namely from all angles, I make an informed decision, even if it might go against my original belief. I found that most “skeptics” and “scientists” are utterly unable to do that; and worse, the ones who do prove that which is frowned upon (like psychic phenomena!) get publicly humiliated and hence, most don’t speak anymore, because some topics would harm their credibility or reputation. How can such a “scientific study” be objective or “true?”

The hypocrisy in those who call themselves skeptics often utterly amazes and stuns me. Apparently, they are so much smarter than the rest of the world, right? I would say they simply drank the other Kool-Aid. If I am absolutely unable to listen to the other side, I am no longer all that unbiased, but have a preconceived notion that cannot be changed, no matter what evidence is presented. How is that different from the religious nutjobs?

Another question that keeps coming up for me is, “who the hell cares?” There are plenty of beliefs that harm absolutely no one. Was it a bad thing that I used to believe in god, namely the man in the sky, when I was a little girl and needed to survive abuse? NO! Of course not. That very belief not only saved my life but also my sanity many times over. The belief in a higher power gave me strength and comfort, where others turned to drugs, violence or alcohol. Do I shove my beliefs down another person’s throat? Do I force anyone to believe the way I do? Not so much! Do I care if “god” is a he, she, an alien or maybe even part of my brain? Nope, I do not. So why do I still believe in something that hasn’t been scientifically proven? Because I have plenty of proof that there is something else beyond the shadow of a doubt. Based on what? My personal, numerous experiences! Maybe that something may come from my brain, maybe not. But anyone who would try to tell me that I am gullible, easily influenced, weak or a sheep, would have to have never met me. And if that is the only argument one has, namely that all who do believe in something must be stupid, is a complete idiot, because I know many people who are highly intelligent and they also believe in something.

Watching the world and feeling more like an observer for most of my life has often proven to me that people are cynics; they can be so jaded, unkind, selfish, dishonest, manipulative and so deeply in denial that it is disheartening to learn that this is the race I am part of. Personally, I feel this world needs more compassion, tolerance and a little bit of magic.

I would be thrilled to live in a world with more people who kept a bit of their childlike innocence. I don’t understand why keeping that makes you weak, delusional or less. And how can that be when millions of people get lost in computer/console games and thousands of them develop them? There seems to be some need to escape to magical lands with magical creatures!

So, for all the cynical schmucks, disguised as skeptics, I would have to say the same that I would say to any fundamentalist, fanatic nutjob “Shut up, already!” Keep your thoughts to yourself, or go and share them with those who want to hear them! We have enough “reality” on this beautiful planet and some of us really like to be able to believe that there are some things out there that can neither be explained nor proven, but just like love, they are no less “real” than your “facts.”